Forgiving God

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“Handidi ini kufa neBP ndigotadza kupinda denga, nekuda kwekusaregera.”

Most of us are familiar with that song by talented gospel artist Takesure Zamar Ncube. We have all at some point sang those words loudly, making sure the object in need of our forgiveness is in close proximity. Or maybe it’s silent hate and grudge that we have harboured for years thereby finding solace in those words.

Hate against parents, church members and society. Whatever the case, we are all familiar with the concept of forgiveness. We have had to give it and in most cases, we ourselves have needed it in return. And yes, while the process of forgiving, especially where we perceive it to be undeserved, is a difficult one. It is necessary. For how else can we function in our relationships or at the very least sustain our mental health if not for the ability to recognise and let go of slights?

Unfaithful spouses, rude boyfriends, cunning friends, loathsome relatives. All manner of offences we have somehow managed to let go off.

So how do you forgive someone incapable of doing wrong? Someone who is said to be infallible, all-knowing and always right? Someone incapable of making any mistakes?

How do you forgive God?

For most people that train of thought is in itself a taboo. For how can a mere human being challenge God?

But I can say that this mere human is not a piece of wood. Yes, I know God always has our best intentions at heart, yet I cannot pretend that some of his choices and actions have not hurt me. They have, and by not admitting it to myself I have created a mental hell.

The author of The Road Less Travelled, Scott Peck, says that the origin of all mental disease stems from the inability to confront issues. There are painful experiences that we keep hidden inside and even pretend to have not occurred or affected and altered us in any way. With time passing, these experiences eat away at our subconscious and become our road map for life until we eventually end up neurotic.

One of these is the inability to be honest with ourselves with regards to how we feel. I mean imagine being in a relationship where you are always the one apologising, where you have to suppress any negative feelings you have about your partner because you are afraid of the consequences. A relationship where you store all your true feelings away and keep a smile to keep your partner happy. To me, that is a classic example of an abusive relationship and yet somehow this is the model template of how our relationship with God should be like. I’m surprised people don’t go mad in such a messed up union.

Your emotions exist for a reason. They tell you whether something good or bad has happened. They keep you from being the recipient of all manner of offences.

Listen if you are feeling angry at God then admit it. Tell him. If you’re sad, tell him.

I believe God didn’t just create forgiveness so we could all be happy and loving like a bunch of care bears. God created forgiveness because it is the platform where we confront our feelings and recognize constructively we have been offended.

Photo by whoislimos on Unsplash

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Valerie Tendai Chatindo

Valerie Tendai Chatindo

Valerie Tendai Chatindo is a biochemist, entrepreneur and a digital storyteller. Follow her at tendy_vchatndo

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